You are currently browsing the monthly archive for March, 2008.
Cos we’ve never heard that one before.
THIS isn’t, apparently, a touchy-feely, “women are more emotional in the workplace” kind of argument.
No, instead it’s a ‘men are just emotionally incapable and LIKE to see others fail, while women make a good judgement not to get involved with aspects of business that require more commitment time-wise’
. . . .
Male performance is boosted simply by having to compete, while female performance is automatically lowered by competition, according to studies that tested fourth-grade schoolchildren under different running scenarios in gym class.
Because, of course, fourth-grade schoolchildren are perfect examples of working women and men. And anyway, why o why o why the generalisation?! Some women perform better when they have to compete (I sure as hell do), and some don’t. The same goes for men.
“More women than men think they’ll do poorly, even when they perform very well,” Dr. Pinker says in the book. “In the competitive sphere this can look like discrimination, when in fact women may be withdrawing from the race of their own accord, based on their faulty self-assessments.”
This, of course, is natural. Women expect to do badly. This couldn’t possibly be a learnt personality trait, could it?
Oh no, let’s not even suggest that. That’s crazy talk. Women just think like that, ok?
To be fair, I’m judging from the article rather than reading the actual book. But really, Dr. Pinker, shouldn’t we have learnt by now that all people behave/think/process information differently? What can we possibly gain from such ‘research’ other than a confirmation of this, which has been gendered? Surely the only thing that this book does, then, is promote the idea that it’s ok for there to be so few women in the higher jobs in business because some women don’t want it, and that men are incapable of real emotion/compassion?
Thus, the power of patriarchy is yet again affirmed - we’ve even got women saying that it’s natural for women to not want to be promoted/paid more! And while we’re at it, let’s confirm that idea of the RealMan - he’s masculine, he’s strong, he likes to compete and WIN, oh yeah, and he just doesn’t do any of that girly compassion bull.
Perleeease. Give me a break.
This, while (sadly) unsurprising, is certainly an interesting read. Women, it would seem, as still seen by 1 in 4 people in Ireland to be partly (if not wholly) responsible for being raped.
As I have said before, I find this idea ridiculous. One of the statistics shows that
38% believe a woman must share some of the blame if she walks through a deserted area.
If someone was walking through a deserted area and was robbed, would they be blamed? While, of course, one should be aware of their own safety, this blaming of the victim is simply unacceptable.
Still, as “dagnymeetsassisi” says, this can also be viewed positively:
” More than 30% think a victim is some way responsible if she flirts with a man or fails to say no clearly. “
Or, 2/3rds believe a woman is NOT responsible despite flirting…. a commanding majority. How would that figure have looked in the 1970’s?
…
“37% think a woman who flirts extensively is at least complicit, if not completely in the wrong, if she is the victim of a sex crime.”
63% - again a commanding majority - do not believe the woman is complicit or wrong.
“One in three think a woman is either partly or fully to blame if she wears revealing clothes.”
Two of three do not believe the woman is partly to blame; most respondants, that is.
“38% believe a woman must share some of the blame if she walks through a deserted area.”
Again, 62% do not beleive a woman shares some part of the blame. Most people, in other words.
I’m not sure how far I agree with this, as 1 in 4 is still distressing regardless of the wiser 3 that believe the rapist to be the criminal, not the victim.
Intrigued, as ever, to hear your thoughts.
And on that note - adieu.
Young boys being made to fight each other. In some older guy’s bedroom. In Crawley.
Fighting, apparently, ‘like girls’.
Why? Just…why?
This is for Andy and the others who were in creative writing today. And actually, for anyone who happens to be interested…
Today we had a discussion in Creative Writing about rape/the safety of women in England now. I’ve found some links that I think are relevant:
- Government money for rape centres
- Rape conviction rate: 37% in 1977, to 5.6% in 2005
“While they conclude there was some evidence of poor investigation and lack of understanding of the law, the main problem was the culture of scepticism among both the police and prosecutors.” (Second source above)
- The rape conviction rate for the last couple of years has proven much more difficult to find than I anticipated. I think we may be wrong in saying that it is as low as 2%, I think it is actually more likely that it has remained at 5 or 6%. (This, from 2007, says 5%…) This is still shocking, as the rate has dropped. By 31.4%.
- This, from 2007, covers a great deal of the issues and inbuilt stereotypes in society RE rape, and discusses both the issues and solutions.
“Judgements about the credibility of charges of rape are often influenced by impressions of the woman’s attractiveness, demeanour, dress and alcohol consumption which are in fact irrelevant to the real issue of consent and the perpetrator’s culpability.”
“Prevalent public attitudes about rape also have a clear influence on the investigation and prosecution of rape cases and at court, and contribute to the low rape conviction rate. Police, prosecutors, judges and, perhaps most importantly, jurors are as likely as any other members of the public to internalise common attitudes about rape, and misconceptions about who are ‘real’ rapists and victims.”
- Responses to the question ‘Why are rape conviction rates so low?’, this January.
- An incredible performance poet, speaking about rape (in fact, check out her site cos she really is amazing)
- And finally (as I think I’ll have to continue this another time because I’m getting so tired and depressed), this - it shouldn’t still need to be said, hell it should never have needed to be said, but it is still relevant and a pretty powerful post. Also the source of my title - see the comments.
On a completely unrelated (and yet, as ever, related in some way) point: this guy’s poem is really powerful.
And on that note - adieu.
…of Praise-God Barebones. And his poor poor son, Nicholas Unless-Jesus-Christ-Had-Died-For-Thee-Thou-Hadst-Been-Damned Barbon.
Teehee.
But still - crazy. Totally crazy. How could he get away with changing his name to that? How can he get away with wanting murder charges for doctors who perform abortions? And the women who have them? How?
I should probably give you the link now, right? So you know what on sweet-mother-earth I’m talking about? 
Anyway, I must away to my philosophy coursework. We have the coursework exam tomorrow, and I’m still not happy with mine so I’m putting finishing touches to it now. It’s a FOUR HOUR exam, with a break in the middle, and we have to basically write it all out again. All 4,000 words. Hooray. Still, we get 1,000 words notes, so it could be worse I guess. It just strikes me as a total waste of time. And it’s 40% of our grade this year! 10% per hour!!
*Weeps*
And on that note - adieu.
…and I’m afraid it’ll be quite a while still, until you get a proper blog from me. I’ve got so much on at the moment!!
But to keep you going till then, here’s a poem I have started. It needs a fair amount (A LOT) of work, but I’d be interested to hear what you think of it thus far.
I Think I Can
I think I can I think I can
the little train puffed
as it struggled its way up the hill.
I remember it, still,
though I heard the tale years ago –
it is a technique I have used myself.
The chant outside the exam room
I think I can I think I can
and the tired whispers of determination
I think I can I think I can
as I dragged myself around the track
a third and final time.
I thought I could, and did.
But now, it’s different.
I enter the darkened street
and the old mantra returns,
sinister now.
Can can can was what I used to hear -
now uncertainty ringing in my ears as
think think think
hits home.
Yet,
pushing my reluctant feet
that long to buckle and give in
to the footsteps close behind me,
the words play on.
Round and round
I think I can I think I can
As I catalogue each sound
I think I can I think I can
Each step ringing loud
I think I can I think I can
Chin held up and proud
I think I can I think I can
And panic deep within.
Buried beneath can and think and I and think and can
A single line within my mind
That carries me past the pub with the ‘alright love’
Down the path with the lack of streetlight
Into the park with the gangs there watching
And homewards homewards through the darkness seeping
Past loveless couples and a heartbeat quickens
Past a white lorry and the atmosphere thickens
And breath is lost until I’m far past
And still
I think I can I think I can
plays on.
Not I thought I could I thought I could
like the little train that could, and did,
but can can can for a future
filled with dark streets
filled with pounding feet
and a sense of defeat
as I repeat:
I think I can I think I can
ad infinitum.
And on that note - Adieu.
Wrote this for the theme ‘My Generation’, set as a challenge in creative writing. Partly for that, partly because I passed two guys doing some work on the roads and one said to the other ‘yeah, but we’re in an age where women can…’ and I hurried past, and partly cos it’s how I feel.
Enjoy.
We’re in an Age
We’re in an age
We’re of an age
The men say on the street
Where marriage is not sacred and
A woman feels complete
Without a man, her better half.
She’s two halves on her own
And where do we fit into that?
Our duties overthrown
-
We’re in an age
We’re of an age
The women disagree
Where spinsterhood is ridiculed
And there’s no equality
Where rape is normalised and we
Have no safe haven near
We can’t walk the streets alone, in darkness.
Every footstep whispers fear.
-
We’re in an age
We’re of an age
The ‘gentlemen’ insist
Where women have the right to put
Their bodies on the list
That we can buy and sell
at leisure
in a world that’s geared
towards our pleasure
-
We’re in an age
We’re of an age
Sigh women far and wide
where just to wear a low cut top
or take a step outside
is to provoke attack, abuse
from men that think they praise us
- but complement us on our ‘tits’?
It never ceases to amaze us.
-
We’re in an age
We’re of an age
Where nothing seems to change
Where women are still victimised
And end up with the blame
A time where, when it comes to rights
It’s the poor oppressed men
Who feminism has destroyed
And who must start again
-
Yes, we’re in an age
We’re of an age
But it’s just like all the rest
No matter how we all despair
And try to protest
There’s a time for equality
The politicians vow
But we’re in an age
We’re of an age
And nothing’s changing now.
-
-
-
And on that note, as ever - Adieu.
at an open mic night in Brighton. I’m quite pleased with it…
It is based upon this picture…from post secret =]
Yesterday (Inspired by a postsecret postcard)
Yesterday I tried to find god
I started deep within myself because
it’s as good a place as any to begin.
So I settled down
and looked within.
In a time of loneliness and sorrow
when my very being seemed to be hollow,
I hoped a god on side would help me through
when I was feeling low and blue.
So I tried my best to understand
how within me there resides a man
who is everything and everyone,
but I must confess that it did not take long
for my mind to wander way off track:
I was lost and there was no way back
from my thoughts of emptiness and love.
There was no voice to captivate from up above
Crying “you’ve found me now it’s your turn to hide”.
There was no answer, no shining light to guide,
No bingo! There was no grand revelation.
But determined to discover my salvation
I decided to look
in a so called holy book
hoping therein would lie the answer that I sought.
Some time later I emerged, distraught
to find misogyny had found a base
in the most vulnerable, hopeful place
within so many searching for an explanation,
longing for a perfect destination
to the journey that our lives begin.
Yet finding gods that reprimand our ‘sin’
and seek confirmation of our ‘true’ belief,
although for some it may provide relief,
seems like a faith that I can do without.
So when I look on with a sceptic’s doubt,
and see ‘gods’, husks of our imagination,
that seem to have a hold upon the nation
I cannot help but disagree
that god can tell me what to do and who to be.
And while I watch the faithful wistfully
and wish I could find consolation in the guarantee
of a life after death, that’s rich and rare,
if I’m honest I can’t say I really care,
when to find this hope I must give up my reason
and my logic and all I truly believe in.
As I value values more than what I’m taught
my beliefs held out against the god I’d sought
and revealed a passion unbeknownst to me
So yesterday I searched for god,
but my failure set me free.
And on that note - adieu.
.
and the generations before
.
and before that
.
and even before that. Nothing seems to change.
..
Read an interesting article in the Woman section of the G2, deeply depressing but interesting nonetheless. Especially as the number of ‘gentleman’s’ clubs in Brighton seems to be increasing, which is insane. They should not exist in the first place, but to build more? New ones? It pains me greatly to think that this is seen as acceptable. This, also relevant but from last year, is fascinating but so sad. Ditto with this timewise - it just confirms what is said in both other sites I’ve referenced - that young women are being sexualised.
..
On a lighter note, this is promising.
..
And, to counter it, as for every piece of good news there is ALWAYS at least 10 pieces of bad news, try this.
Ok, so I was going to link to this article on Feministing about a guy whose brother raped his wife by pretending to be the husband. Disgusting, especially considering the response from the agony aunt who was written to about it. But as I went to pick up the link, I saw something new. The link I have actually given you makes me feel physically sick. Truly, to the bottom of my stomach.
In fact, being the over-emotional-hysterical woman that I am, it makes me cry. That other women can ridicule a woman who has been mutilated…it begs belief. I just have no words to even begin to explain how foul it is to mock a woman for her abuse.
In a supposedly ‘developed’ country, why is it we are faced every day with such disgraceful disregard for women?
. .
It makes me wonder what the point is, really. As I said before - I’m talking bout my generation, but it’s the same for so many generations gone by that one begins to wonder if it’s possible to progress at all.
Perhaps progress is in fact a myth, and all we get is veiled digression. Nothing seems to change.
..
And on that note - adieu.
..
(But for those who want to depress themselves further about the reality of this shithole we call Earth, here’s the brother-rape story. And if you want to see whether the earlier link was a one off from jezabel.com, try this. I weep. Especially as sometimes she seems to have something decent to say, too.)
I’m sticking to uber brief posts at the mo as I have too much to do.
But how’s this for a bit of fun misogynistic crap you can send your friends on Facebook? :
Words fail me. I weep.
It has not been a good day.
Here’s somthing amusing to cheer you (*ahem* ME) up
Oh and hell, have a rather fab poem as well:
USE OF ENGLISH
The phrase ‘politically correct’
is not at all what you’d expect.
But how has it been hijacked so?
I’m going to tell you, ‘cos I know.
You’d think it should mean kind and smart
Radical and stout of heart
A way of living decently.
Well, so it did, till recently.
And then some cringing, nerdy divs
Sweaty, misogynistic spivs
Sad, halitosis-ridden hacks
all wearing lager-stained old macs
with spots and pustules and split ends
and absolutely zero friends
(Yes, living, breathing running sores:
The right wing press’s abject whores)
Were all told, by their corporate chiefs
To rubbish decent folks’ beliefs
To label with the phrase ‘P.C’
All that makes sense to you and me
And write off our progressive past.
Their articles came thick and fast
The editors gladly received them
and loads of idiots believed them.
You’ll find that most who use the term
Will only do so to affirm
Sad, bigoted, outdated views
they’ve swallowed via the Murdoch news.
by ATTILA THE STOCKBROKER
And on that note: Adieu!
…is the name of this article. It was written by Alex Gibson, a modern history student at Magdalen College, Oxford. Apparently, “He is very proud to add feminism to a list of ‘isms’ he cares passionately about, and is quite fond of making his friends uncomfortable in the pub by talking about it”. Go him - I’m glad that there are men out there that identify with feminism. But while I’m happy for him that he can add feminism to his impressive list, I had a few issues with his article.
In essence, it was fair enough. Men have to face gender stereotypes and that sucks for them. Poor things. But right from the title, I was perplexed. “Why Men Should Care About Gender Stereotypes”…well, why should they? The message is clear - because it affects them, too. In fact, some stereotypes about men are “allowed to flourish in - dare I say it - a much more brazen way than the stereotypes about women”. Of course, if it only affected women then, one is led to assume, men shouldn’t care about gender stereotypes.
While I agree with him over several of his points, this overall principle, that the reason men should care is because it affects them too, marred my opinion of the whole article. Not only this, but also his attitude to feminism as though it were purely for advancing women. While there is a clear focus upon women within feminism, as it is, more often than not, about equality and women being treated equally to men, his article seemed to suggest that feminism only rejects the ludicrous ideas held about women and that, indeed, there is nothing that addresses the issue of supposed ‘masculinity’.
The problem is, while women are encouraged to reject the ludicrous ideas that are held about them, men are supposed to embrace them.
The idea of all women rejecting gender stereotypes is a wonderful one. What bliss, when all women are raised by feminists who ensure that they shed gender stereotypes and consider themselves as individuals. But that is not reality. When so many women and men are brought up in the clutches of gender stereotypes, it is not right to say that women reject gender stereotypes while men are expected to embrace them. Both ‘genders’ are expected to conform to the stereotypes that are rife in modern society, but I would never go so far as to say that stereotypes about men are allowed to flourish more than those about women. When the ‘worst’ swear word in England, cunt, describes the female anatomy, when women are portrayed on tv, in programmes and adverts and films and in books, cartoons, and games as conforming to ’stereotypes’, when there are still ‘girls mags‘ which expect women to only care about make-up, clothes, shoes, and, of course, men, when feminism comes under ‘life & style‘ if acknowledged at all in national papers, when to ignore the advances of other men makes you a ’slut’, how can you say that stereotypes about men flourish more?
I’d love to know.
Yes, Alex isn’t an anti-feminist. And he wouldn’t want to undermine the wrongs done to women - I appreciate this. However the way that he has approached the issue is deplorable, as he not only sees it as an issue for men just because they are also victims of it, but also seems to think that men have a harder time than women when it comes to gender stereotypes
I would never dare to suggest that men have a harder time than women in general society, because that’s just patently untrue, but in terms of stereotypes we fail utterly.
Yes, he has some good points. The main one, of course, is that men also suffer from patriarchy.
Men are often characterised as spoiled, helpless brats utterly unable to perform simple household tasks, too stupid to remember anniversaries and appointments and completely unable to understand these strange female creatures and their hysterical emotions. We’re base brutes ruled by our overactive sex drives who simply can’t help being crass and immature, because that is the way God made us. Basically, we are mentally deficient lumps who require a female carer to function in society.
But to then say that
This is precisely the kind of ridiculous stereotype that, if applied to women, would be torn to shreds in intelligent debate.
seems rather naive. Yes, in intelligent debate it would be. But so would ridiculous stereotypes about men. However, more often than not we aren’t dealing with intelligent debate. We’re dealing with one-sided views, we’re dealing with people who have grown up being told what girls do and what boys do, so have been socialised into accepting these stereotypes. We’re dealing with anti-feminists who believe the stereotypes that they have been fed with.
Also, to assume that the stereotype of men as ‘mentally deficient lumps’ is the prevalent one could also be misguided. There are a great deal of stereotypes that say that men are more intelligent, more capable of achieving, better at academic studies while women are supposed to flourish creatively. However, Alex clearly hasn’t experienced these as he believes that male academics aren’t celebrated.
Let’s stop putting sports stars on a pedestal and start celebrating poets, writers, scientists and artists.
Actually, male poets, writers, scientists and artists are celebrated widely. Hell, the new freebee with the Guardian is ‘Great Poets of the 20th Century’ and guess how many women poets were great?
One.
Out of seven.
Of course, Plath was amazing. But anyone would believe she’s the only woman that’s ever written decent poetry.
Anyway, I feel that I have dwelled on this for too long. Basically, I agree that gender stereotypes are wrong, both logically and morally. But to suggest that male stereotypes are almost worse than female? I have an issue with that. Also, to suggest that the only reason men should care is because they are affected by it is ridiculous.
I’d be interested to hear what y’all think of the article, and, to balance it, look at this un:
She talks about supposedly ’sexist’ feminism, and about the ideas put forward by Alex about male stereotypes. And there are some good links to male ‘movements’ at the end
And on that note - Adieu!
The Gender Mirror - pretty interesting way to approach modern issues - invert them! It certainly makes you think…
Feminism is bad for your health. This is from last year. Gah.
And, unrelated - uk teenagers may have to, among other things, pledge allegiance to the queen. Um - no. It’s a rather mixed article actually…
Some laughs :
The style and content of the events should be “re-energised”, perhaps with a rendition by schoolchildren of the pop song We Are The World, last year’s report said.
(Seriously, I laughed a LOT…just picture the teenagers you know in the UK. Now picture them singing We Are The World while declaring their joy to be a British citizen and their love of the Queen. Please.)
Some ideas that are almost good:
Lord Goldsmith has also hinted at updating the national anthem by removing verses which are rarely performed.
I’d just change it altogether though, tbh. It doesn’t reflect England properly and it is such a tuneless piece of crap.
Some realism:
People born and raised in this country are often far too cynical about being British and it seems to be a national pastime to put down British institutions and our way of life.
Aaaand…some SHOCK:
It has been reported that laws, such as sleeping with the wife of the heir to the throne, which carries life imprisonment, would be scrapped or reformed because they are regarded as outdated.
What, outdated?? You mean, like, life imprisonment for adultery isn’t still the norm? And heirs to the throne don’t have to be married? Or men? Never. *Sigh*
And on that note - adieu!
So, yesterday was International Women’s Day. I wore a badge to work, and one woman said to me
‘Oh my goodness, is it Women’s Day?? I have a degree in women’s studies and I didn’t know!’
Which says a lot, really. Awareness of this supposedly international day, in England, is very poor. Unless you’re already looking into it, or you live in central London, the likelihood of the average Jane knowing is slim. It’s infuriating, really - the one day that the whole world is supposed to be celebrating women, and England doesn’t really give a shit.
Anyway, it’s delayed but there is one woman I have discovered recently, while trawling through vids from Whose Line is it Anyway? rather than working, who is really quite something. Her name, my friends, is Josie Lawrence, and she’s a FANTASTIC comedian It’s unusual to see women on comedy shows (See Mock the Week, Have I Got News For You etc), and it would appear that only a few years ago this wasn’t the case - Josie and many other women took part in the Whose Line is it Anyway sketches…
Nowadays, we don’t hear so much about her. But she’s still going strong. She’s done some work for radio, her latest being on Just a Minute, is playing the lead role in Tom Stoppard’s Hapgood at the Birmingham Repertory Theatre, and had guest appearance in Skins. She has made great contributions to charity - in 2003 Josie spent eight months walking across China, Cuba, Peru and Tanzania for Breakthrough Breast Cancer and in 2005 she climbed Mount Kilimanjaro for Sunfield – a school for children with learning difficulties - of which she is a patron. She is also a supporter of the National Autistic Society’s Make School Make Sense campaign.
So today (in place of yesterday) is my celebration, and while I celebrate women everyday, I’d like to take today to celebrate Josie Lawrence, and all the other female comedians who deserve to be remembered. There are so many brilliant, funny women out there, we just need to give them back the limelight that is rightfully theirs.
(Oh, there are so many…tis tricky to choose from!)
I’d also like to take a moment to despair. There are no words. Just…despair.
As the wise Bo Burnham says:
George Bush won’t he just yell and rant
But he’s a presiDONT who ameriCANT
Anyway. At work the other day this guy came in, and stayed for AGES. He wanted some music for a talk he was doing about wildlife in Sussex [I kid you not, our conversation literally went like this:
Me: So what's this music for?
CrazyGuy: Oh, for my talk. I do a lot of talks, this one's about nature.
Me: Oh, how lovely.
CrazyGuy: Yeah, it's incredible. If you just show someone a picture of a woodlouse they'll be unimpressed, disgusted even. But with the right lighting, the perfect music, it can bring a tear to your eye.
Me: ...uhhuh.
See - crazy.] Oh, laughter is difficult to silence but silence it I did. However, I didn’t do so well when I was playing CrazyGuy some Einaudi (amazing composer, and it was a cd of someone else playing his piano concertos which I am rather excited about buying at some point). He was enjoying it, I was pretty taken with it myself, and this other guy, let’s call him ObnoxiousIWishHe’dGoAway Guy, ObnoxiousGuy for short, came over to the counter with his daughter. He looks at us and this follows:
ObnoxiousGuy: You could listen to this music all day, couldn’t you?
Me: Yes, definitely (*pleased as CrazyGuy has been monitoring the responses of other customers while in search of emotive woodlouse music*)
ObnoxiousGuy: It’s so…dull. You can just let it wash over you. I mean, there’s nothing to it. A six year old could play this.
Me: …
*My boss continues to serve ObnoxiousGuy, I try to ignore him and then…*
ObnoxiousGuy: It’s like…what’s that awful woman’s name?
ObnoxiousGuy’sDaughter: *laughs in a really irritating weedy way* Oh daddy, do you mean Amy Winehouse?
ObnoxiousGuy: Yeah, Amy Winehouse. Doesn’t she look a state.
Me: Oh, that’s a shame (see, polite :)), personally I really like Amy Winehouse’s voice.
ObnoxiousGuy: Well, I…
Me: And as far as my opinion of music goes, it’s more how it sounds and how much enjoyment I get from the piece of music rather that what the singer looks like that matters.
ObnoxiousGuy: But she is a state. I can’t bear her.
At which point I registered the evils my boss was giving me and shut up. But it’s always the way! Sure, he was one ObnoxiousGuy and he was ridiculous about Einaudi too, but it’s so unusual for someone to say ‘Oh, that Mark Ronson, he’s such a mess. I won’t listen to his music’ or ‘God, Elvis let himself go, I can’t bear to listen to his music now’ but female singers/bands are instantly judged on their appearance and their lifestyles. At some point, sure, their talent is considered. But look at Amy Winehouse - she’s incredibly talented. But so many people hate her, because of the way she leads her life. I think she needs help, yes, and she would probably perform better if she were more healthy. But while I may look at her lifestyle with concern, I won’t let it affect my enjoyment of her music.
Anyway, so that was the ‘fall out’ at work - my boss said afterwards that it’s best to leave things like that (because then ‘they leave the shop much more quickly’ - if it weren’t for me he’d not have stuck around contaminating the shop…) but there are some things that I just won’t let lie. If a customer says something that I strongly disagree with, I’ll say. I won’t say it rudely, and I’ll accept their right to an opinion, but I’ll not silence my own. So that’s that.
And on that note - Adieu!
Just saw this on a friend’s facebook - um, wtf?
Oh also - I’ve changed the blog from Esse Quam Videri to The Token Feminist - it makes more sense than the web address being a totally different blog name
…International Women’s Day!
I’d blog more, but my rents are taking me to dinner So I’ll be back later…
So there are two things that I wanna talk about. One: National Women’s Day. And two: surnames and hyphenation. Handily connected in my title *is pleased with self*
International Women’s Day is celebrated on the 8th of March, so it’s soon! And I’d like to do something at college to join the celebrations, or at least to acknowledge it…any suggestions??
Here’s some background:
IWD is now an official holiday in Armenia, Russia, Azerbaijan, Belarus, Bulgaria, Kazakhstan, Kyrgyzstan, Macedonia, Moldova, Mongolia, Tajikistan, Ukraine, Uzbekistan and Vietnam. The tradition sees men honouring their mothers, wives, girlfriends, colleagues, etc with flowers and small gifts. In some countries IWD has the equivalent status of Mother’s Day where children give small presents to their mothers and grandmothers.
The new millennium has witnessed a significant change and attitudinal shift in both women’s and society’s thoughts about women’s equality and emancipation. Many from a younger generation feel that ‘all the battles have been won for women’ while many feminists from the 1970’s know only too well the longevity and ingrained complexity of patriarchy. With more women in the boardroom, greater equality in legislative rights, and an increased critical mass of women’s visibility as impressive role models in every aspect of life, one could think that women have gained true equality. The unfortunate fact is that women are still not paid equally to that of their male counterparts, women still are not present in equal numbers in business or politics, and globally women’s education, health and the violence against them is worse than that of men.
However, great improvements have been made. We do have female astronauts and prime ministers, school girls are welcomed into university, women can work and have a family, women have real choices. And so the tone and nature of IWD has, for the past few years, moved from being a reminder about the negatives to a celebration of the positives.
All this and more found here
What do y’all think? Do we need a day to celebrate women and their achievements? I personally think that it’s important, as it is one day of the year where it really isn’t taboo to talk about women’s issues and speaking out is…well, pretty much expected. For once. BUT that is only if people have heard of the day - not many people I know of are aware of when it is…or even that it exists!
I also just discovered the Brighton and Hove group: here and there’s a comedy night on Thurs…I wonder if I could go…
Anyway, I digress. If anyone has any ideas for IWD at my college, nothing too large scale because a) I have very little time, and b) There’s not a great deal of support there…then I’d appreciate them!
As for surnames…
Today, I was talking to a friend about Jessica Valenti’s book, Full Frontal Feminism, who had read an extract, and she said she disagreed with what Jessica had to say about the changing of surnames. It turned into a rather big discussion, and I was the only one there saying that changing one’s name is significant. That it still is the tradition for women to take their husbands name. And that, at some point, the patriarchal system of passing on the husband/father’s name has to be addressed.
So, here’s what was said by t’others…
- Surnames don’t matter. They are just names, after all.
- Women can do what they like with their names now, everyone knows that.
- Surely feminism should focus on something else, something more important?
- Hyphenated names are ‘annoying’ and just mean that your child has to choose which part of the name to keep.
Of course, as the proud owner of a hyphenated surname, the last one rubbed me the wrong way a little. But I think that it’s a good solution. As is forging a new surname between you, moving on from the family ‘line’ and starting anew. I don’t think that your surname is your identity. But I think that it can still be important to you, that there’s power in a name (as most fantasy novels will tell you!) and so to dismiss it as a non-issue is saddening. Especially as it was almost a symbol of ownership, of a woman moving from being their father’s property to their husband’s. I for one am not happy with that, however traditional it may be.
Also, feminism really doesn’t focus on surnames. There’s no one focus, unless you say that it’s taking action towards equality. I often get that argument, if I ever take issue with the presentation of women in films/tv, or something similar. Why should I care, why doesn’t feminism focus on more important things?
Hell, one man (a teacher, surprisingly) even said to me ‘why do you focus on feminism when there are children dying in Africa?’. He was rather surprised when I said that I think feminism could help that, for if women were treated equally to men then they wouldn’t be raped in Africa, and they would be allowed access to contraception, so they wouldn’t have so many children and HIV wouldn’t be so widespread. Then there would be less mouths to feed, so less children starving, and more children would still have their mothers, rather than losing them to HIV.
Yet again, I digress. What do you think RE surnames? Do women still take their husbands name out of respect for tradition, or do they keep their own? Is it still surprising for men to take their wife’s surname? (Interesting, in regards to this, that in 1990 people were starting to see the sexism in surnames, yet in 2003 they appear to have digressed to an acceptance of the husband’s surname again…) Are hyphenated surnames irritating? And do they really matter at all, in the end? Perhaps we should drop them altogether, as this woman did…
Oh also, on a side note - I am almost exploding with anger over this…Charlotte Allen clearly lacks any intelligence or logic whatsoever.
And on that note - adieu.
![me and me =]](http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3167/2530107407_91183565a4_t.jpg "me and me =]")
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